Now I understand some of you don't know Sarah Jane, so I'll tell you a
little bit about her. She's a lesbian Eskimo midget albino. She went
to college and she started the Lesbian Eskimo Midget Albino Student
Union, and 400 people signed up! There they were. Hundreds of 'em -
lesbian midget left-handed Eskimo albinos. Did I mention the fact she's
left handed? She's left handed alright.
Girls got some strange hobbies. One of her hobbies is lowering children
into open man-holes. Which is kind of difficult cause a lot of the
children are taller than her, her being a midget and everything - well,
her being a left-handed midget - well, her being a left-handed lesbian
midget - well, her left-handed lesbian albino midget - well, her being a
left-handed lesbian albino midget Eskimo. Life can be really difficult
on that young lady.
She bit me once, you know. Right here. You see this? Left a mark.
She was lowering a friend of mine's kid into the sewer. I run up and
tried to stop her. I said 'Listen there you lesbian midget left-handed
albino!' And she stopped right there. And she bit me!
I'm afraid I'm gonna... I'm gonna turn into a lesbian left-handed
midget albino when the moon is full. Oh my God the moon is full
tonight! I can feel myself shrinking. I can feel myself getting
left-handed. I can feel myself getting the urge to build an igloo. I
can feel my skin turning white and my eyes getting red. I can feel - I
can feel the urge to buy a Suzanne Vega album!
NOOOO!!! NOOOO!!!! NOOOO!!!! AUUGGGHHH!!!
Oh, ok, it's just gas.