Met a girl, her name was Jade
Cuts her nails with a razor blade
Says she lives by no one's law
Ran my pride through a big chainsaw
Have you heard of DB Cooper
I got pulled over by an old state trooper
I met a girl, her name was Jade
She cut my face with a razor blade
Yeah, I screamed out in fury
Yeah, but my cries were not heard
Yeah, the judge and the jury
Yeah, they could offer no cure
I met a girl, her name was Jade
She got a brand new man and they got engaged
The wedding's gon' be on a big green hill
They hope it won't rain but it probably will
The man, he was a football star
He broke his knee, now he sells cars
Only so much that words can do
Love was blind, but they cured that, too
You know, Gandhi has a son our age
He said the freedom thing's just one big cage
I met a girl, her name was Jade
Her husband died, but she kept his name
Yeah, she screamed out in fury
Yeah, but her cries were not heard
Yeah, her mom was so worried
Yeah, but she could offer no cure
Boss man calls for a meeting at noon
Big cigar in an oak board room
We got an idea and we think it's great
Said it was too much so we're gonna try eight
Who made love to Scarlet Jo
And where the hell did Josh Hartnett go
I met a girl, her name was Jade
Lived her whole damn life in a mascaraed
Yeah, I screamed out in fury
Yeah, but my cries were not heard
Yeah, they said I'll never see 30
Yeah, they could offer no cure
I met a girl, her name was Jade
She cuts her nails with a razor blade